Bits of the City Centre

This is what I would have posted on Saturday if I had had internet access. (excuse the formatting, will deal with it later.)

In the morning I went to a stationary store and bought some oil pastels, since they didn't have paint. The shopkeeper was super friendly and was trying to sell me the only paint he did have, a bottle of poster paint, but he had no brushes. He promised me that he would order some and to come back in 2 weeks. Let's see if it happens. After the stationary store I headed over to what was supposed to be a 'Stand Up' and take action demonstration by NGOs to hold the government, bilateral and multilateral institutions accountable to their committments to the Millenium Development Goals and to the MKUKUTA, The Tanzanian National Action Plan to Eradicate Poverty. The UN and development partners were invited, but when I went nobody other than local students were present. I was also expecting it to be full of people and bursting with energy, similar to events I went to in India. Instead I walked into a half empty grounds, with someone speaking, which I couldn't understand because it was in Swahili, and a crowd of students that seemed to be drained of energy. Maybe I missed the energetic portion of the program. It is an important issue. Its the NGOs who are doing the work, but yet they're often not given a seat at the table with the big dogs making the decision. Well, I hope that the event was a success for them. Here are a few photos.

Focus on the writing on the visor.

Listening, zoning out, checking the cell for messages

A school group in the shade

I then went to my favorite Indian restaurant at the Badminton Institute and had lunch and walked around the city taking photos with my SLR. Other than one questionable man who kept hovering around me while I took a photo, it went well. Now that I feel comfortable with that, the next step is the market place, where the real interesting captures are. Saturday was Diwali and I was expecting all the shops to be closed, but they were all bustling with last minute shoppers preparing for the evenings festivites. Diwali photos will come in a seperate post. Here are some shots of the city centre.

Want your shoes shined, only to immediately get dusty again?

The Dar skyline.

City centre flats

Tried to capture this from the window of a taxi on my way home. I like the slogan "Bring out the gorgeous woman in you"

One of the many mandirs in the city

Oh yeah, almost forgot. Friday night when I got back to my place there was a huge tent set up outside of our entrance. I asked roomie what was going on and she told me that 40 days before the old man leaving below us passed away and this was his sort of wake where family and friends gather to celebrate his life. She said it would go on for a few hours. Ha! It went on all night and continued till 4pm Saturday afternoon. It was a night of singing and talking. Saturday morning, I took this picture of their backyard from the kitchen window. Big pots of meat and rice. Reminded me of festivals I attended in India. That was the first time I had seen such huge pots and stirring spoons, more like rods. It was nice to see things aren't so different here.

The same neighbors washing clothes. I wonder if they've seen me snapping photos of them. It's probably rude to do it...oops

HAPPY DIWALI!!!

HAPPY DIWALI to all!

(technically tomorrow, but I won't have internet access)

This made me happy today when I read it on my favorite South Asian blog, Sepia Mutiny. President Obama is the first President to personally celebrate Diwali and he has re-instated a federal panel on Asian American and Pacific Islander issues. The group was created by President Clinton, but expired under President Bush. But its back now! There is hope!

Outlook Overhaul

I wanted to start this post like this: Been awake since 2am. Roomie upgraded her snoring levels and added some coughing. Moved onto the couch at 4am and spent the next 2 hrs being eaten alive by mosquitos.

BUT after a dear friend's advice, I really got to stop focusing on the negatives and find some small pleasures in my everyday misery outside of the office otherwise I'm going to end up hating every minute of being here. Like this morning as I laid on the couch I heard the call to at 5. I just listened to the beautiful sounds, not understanding a word but loving the idea of knowing that at that moment, all around Dar, people were praying. I wondered what and who they prayed for and for unexplainable reasons, it calmed my anger. I appreciated that roomie woke up at 6 to find me on the couch and to ask me if I was feeling ok. When I told her I couldn't sleep, she guessed it was because of the snoring and she apologized and said we'll have to come up with a solution. Though I know there really isn't one other than my moving and I don't have the bucks for that, I appreciated the fact she recognized it was a problem. Lastly, I appreciated the fact that for the first time since I've been here, I had a seat on the dala dala this morning. Finally, one ride without being sandwiched between 2 people. I got to sit next to an open window and feel the ocean breeze as we passed through the deserted streets (its a national holiday).

So this is the start of my attempt to just accept that sleep won't be coming easy for the next few months, but that not all things are bad. Think positive and maybe positive things will happen. And I apologize in advance if I do occasionally write another bitter, negative post. Change is slow right? So I end with a smile : )

Thanks friend.

*Warning* Long, very negative rant

Such a rotten day yesterday. As my previous posts states my trip was canceled. I didn’t make it to the tailor because the coordinator from the organization that runs the shelter came and basically had me write his report for him, which was annoying the crap out of me, and I got an email from a friend that unhinged me for a moment. I left the office at 5 in a crappy mood and ended up waiting for stupid a dala dala (public bus) for 30mins. While I waited I took this photo.

My view at the bus stop.

As I was standing there I kept thinking on the other side of this ocean is India and how I wish I could swim the ocean to get there and away from here. As my dala dala was approaching I was all set to take a picture, but my battery died and I didn’t have enough time to switch batteries. So you’ll see a picture of a dala dala soon. I don’t know why I keep taking these stupid dala dalas that take forever to come. And while I wait I subject myself to constant staring because for whatever reason (though I suspect it has a bit to do with almighty status they have here) never ride the bus. Balding man (my name for the man renting a room here) asked me one morning how I can get to work and I said the dala dala. His exact words, “Oh you shouldn’t ride the dala dala. There are only black people on there.” Ummm HELLO we are in bloody Africa, who did you expect to see?!?! So here I am, an Indian (dropping the American bit for now since so many people don’t seem to believe me), who is breaking the norm by riding the dala dala and oh yeah I don’t speak Swahili. I can’t count anymore how many times a taxi driver has said “Why don’t you speak Swahili?” I usually calmly say I’m not from here. Today I wanted to yell from the rooftops “I’m not Tanzanian Indian!!!” Which I’m so glad because the only Indians I’ve met so far are lazy, arrogant, and think the world is at their feet. Bet if they left this cushioned society of personal massages, cooks, drivers, even people to turn the light on and off for you when your 2 steps away from doing it yourself they would have a rude awakening.

Needless to say I was not in a good mood on the way home, which only worsened when I realized I couldn’t go in my room and lay down because roomie was getting a personal massage. Not like I would have been comfortable laying down since the bed collapsed on Saturday so one corner of the bed is being held up by a stool and now I have to sleep at a slant until she fixes it, which should be fixed by now, but of course that's expecting too much. So I decided to go to the terrace to capture my surroundings and to hope that the sound of the releasing shutter would release some of my frustration and bring some positivity in my life.

Bought this necklace for a friend, but then I wore it and now I want to keep it. The beads are made out of paper recycled paper. I like how the colors are similar to this blog. Carribean Conservation Chic are you proud???

The gate to my building

I could have lived in that tall building which has a view of all of Dar es Salaam, a pool and a gym. But chose not to live with a questionable man.

The neighboring houses.

My neighbor's rooftop garden.

Those below us. Do you see the baby greenish blue hens??? So cute.

Sadly though, my frustrations only continued. When I tried to get online so I could write this post I couldn't get the wrieless signal at all. I'm fearing I've been caught for stealing and of course the cable that I was told before I rented the room worked, doesn't. Big surprise! So I tried to watch a movie that I bought, but my computer decided not play the dvd, even though it has in the past. So I curled up into a ball and tried to go to sleep only to be awaken at 4am because roomie kept needing to go to the bathroom. So I thought for 2 hours about 2 things...why is roomie so inconsiderate and is all this worth it.

Point 1

Roomie wakes up constantly, think she has some bowel problems, and snores. These things I know she can't control but why must she always turn on all the lights each time she wakes up??? When I wake up I fumble around in the dark, get dressed in the morning in the dark, and walk and open doors and cabinets, etc. as quietly as possible. I kept thinking about how I wish I could just do what I want without any care to the other person. Instead my every movement is to ensure that I don't disturb roomie and then end up complaining and being miserable. I even did this with my Cambridge roommate. Any suggestions on how to break this trend and just live comfortably without scurrying around as quiet as a mouse and always being on guard??? All in all she is nice and makes good food and stays out of my business. She told me I could turn the lights on in the morning, but I just personally can't without feeling like I'm disturbing her and then I get pissed she doesn't do the same for me when she turns the lights on in the middle of the night. What the hell is wrong with me?

Point 2

Why am I here? Is beefing up my resume worth my sanity? Really since day 1 this whole thing has been one hurdle after another from getting a TOR to getting my passport stolen to getting a place to live to now trying to get a residency permit because they won't extend my visa. I have 4 weeks left before I have to leave the country and when I asked the woman at the UN who takes care of these things she told me I'm not staff so she can't help. WTF! I have a bloody contract. I've been pushing this since I got here and my advisor says 'oh don't worry, it'll get fixed if not you can just go to Nairobi.' Yeah like I have 500 bucks for a plane ticket plus I have to get a visa to go to Kenya. So I waited thinking it would happen and now 4 weeks left and I've taken matters into my own hands. I went to the immigration office just to be told to pay 120 bucks for a residency permit and I have to get all these letters from the UN. Long story short, it has been one obstacle after another and I've hit my limit now. Is this worth it? Honestly, I don't think so and if I could do it over I would have chosen a different practicum. I'm learning alot, doing high level work blah blah blah. I'm sick of meetings and paperwork. I want to go back to my barefoot days of being connected with people.

Somebody tell me something good will happen to me soon!!! What does the virgo horoscope look like for the coming months???

CANCELED!!!

I blogged too soon. My first trip to the field was canceled today so that we can stay behind and do more paperwork and attend a bloody, pointless meeting on Wednesday. I'M SO BUMMED! I feel like I did when I was little when I would get so psyched for a trip to Dairy Queen for ice cream (a special treat) and then be told on the day of the planned trip that my parents were caught up in work or some other excuse. I would so look forward to it that thats all I would think about all week and then bam, all my hopes of eating a Reese blizzard shattered. Thats how dissappointed I feel today. Im a gonna cry now. :*(

Contemporary Dance Fest.

Saturday night I went to a contemporary dance festival. It was a 4 day festival with dances from East African groups and some European groups. I got to see 3 Tanzanian, an Ethiopian, and Swedish performances. It was interesting to say the least. The last Tanzanian one was downright bizarre and I didn't get it at all. It was titled Rood which means red in Dutch and involved alot of red paint being dumped on the dancers. It was way over my head. I wasn't expecting to see men dancing in their underwear, which I'm sure the parents that bought their kids weren't expecting either.

I did really like the one called Black in White. This dance was about a horrendous human rights violation that still occurs today, killing of albinos. Witch doctors are still practicing making magic potions out of human body parts. Albinos are targeted for these killings for 2 reasons: One, they are not considered to be human. Two, it's believed by the witch doctors that the skin of an albino has magical power. Women and children are mostly targeted. These killings are endemic to most of sub-Saharan Africa. I haven't learned the complete history of these killings, but they still occur today. This dance was portraying these killings. What was interesting was that the choreographer mixed medias and used bits of an interview with an albino woman as a backdrop to the dance. It was emotional as she talked of how her mom fear This is an issue I definitely want to understand better. I'm anticipating a visit in November to the region where most of the killings have taken place. Once I learn more Ill be sure to share it.

All in all it was an interesting night. I'm glad to finally see a cultural event in Dar as they seem to be scarce.

Leaving Dar!!!!

WOOHOOOOOO!!!! I'm FINALLY going to the field. I leave on Tuesday and come back on Thursday. Its a short trip to participate in event (don't ask me what it is, I'm just happy to be going) for Nyerere day hosted by the Ministry of Gender. I LOVE LOVE LOVE being in the field, but this is far different from my past field experiences with Barefoot in India. Then we always drove or took a train or bus. We usually crammed 12 people in an 8 seater jeep and drove for hours crossing Rajasthan by night. I even once had to lay down (if I sat up I would hit the roof) on a pile of fabric at the back of the jeep for a 14hr ride. Once we got to the field we talked with communities, saw projects, and worked tirelessly.

Not this time though. When I asked my colleague if we were going by car or bus, she laughed and said, "Are you crazy?!?!" I thought it was a logical question, but apparently not in UN world. How silly of me to ask, of course we're spending 500 bucks per person to go by air. Shucks I wanted to drive and see the country. We will be going to Mara region, near the Kenyan border and Serengeti National Park (sadly no side trip to Serengiti this time). Also, another point of difference is that this time instead of working, we're partaking in a event of some sort, which coincides nicely for the government whose in campaign mode. Needless to say this will be one politically charged event and an interesting one at that.

Also yay for me. UNIFEM asked me if I would be so kind as to take the photos. Of course! Little do they know that I would absolutely love to! Stay tuned for the recap of my first Tanzanian field visit with the government.

By the way here is information on Julius Nyerere, Tanzania's first president, who will be celebrated on Wednesday a public holiday, but not a UN holiday as I learned.